Bean's Song of the Day

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Wednesday, October 8, 2008

I’M COMING OUT, I WANT THE WORLD TO KNOW…

WEEK 18
I try not to discuss work on such a lovely site like this but it is work that is kicking me in the a**. Then, Little Bean continuously brings me back to reality and I am thankful. A little rub to my belly and I realize no matter what I do, I can’t make everyone happy all the time. It’s day by day. That is all I will state about this week with work. Little Bean is bringing me a new sense of peace I don’t think I would have ever reached alone. Ryan saves me from myself and the little one fulfills the other half I need, harmony. Hmmm…possible name option?

Funny thing about this little bundle of love, possibly being a girl, is that Ryan, I think week 12, had a vivid dream about a “gorgeous little girl” with big green eyes and was this amazingly brilliant child. I was in the kitchen in the morning when he came in from just waking up and told me ALL about it with the sweetest, dumbfounded smile I have ever seen. He carried on about the details, Little Red-Haired girl (go Charlie Brown) and she was about 4-5 years old in the dream. It melted my heart ‘cos was this a premonition, I guess we will find out week 19?

Ryan has been working so hard on getting the house ready for us and it looks amazing. I can't even express the hard work he has put in to make sure we are moving in to a chemical-free, aesthetically pleasing house. Arrrgghhh, I love this guy! Anyhow, he suggested I do some yard work and landscaping and I thought “cheap!” That is not contributing like he is BUT I wound up having a great time. He was inside stripping paint; I was raking and trimming. It was fun. I didn’t get much done Sunday ‘cos we bought a porch swing on Craig’s List and I was able to pick it up. That took up a good chunk of time. I can’t wait to give it a good go next weekend. Any suggestions for this amateur landscaper/gardener, please? I want to do lavender bushes in the front of the house…hmmm…

Well, I am a cheese ball, sue me, but when I was delivering our last rent check, that felt weird ‘cos the next check will be for a MORTGAGE. The building “manager” casually extended our chat long enough to ask the big question I have tried to dodge as
much as possible. I saw it coming but I’m a sucker for babies and she has a little 2 month old. In that conversation, as I had confessed about my belly, she suggested for me to go online and Google “Chinese Calendar for Gender” prediction and of course, I did…duh! And so, in about 8 out of 10 calendars, it’s a girl! She swears by it and promises it has been accurate with her friends too! So, 2 lady predictions later, a doctor sorta’ guessing it is a girl, several free internet Chinese calendars later, we are having a little girl…awwww…I stared at that last ultrasound picture and saw the cutest little girl face I have ever seen. I was in la-la-land.

Oh, guess what, the turkey is baking and will be done soon as my belly button begins to make its way out! I was rubbing some of that belly crème on and realized this week, “holy smokes, what else is changing here?” My little button. Looks weird to ‘cos for sho’ I am pregnant!

No, no, check this out. Guess who made her dancing debut? Little Bean! That’
s right ladies and gentlemen (seriously are any guys reading this?)…I felt movement. Actually, I felt official movement October 7th at about midnight. This has been traditionally a time I wake up to use the restroom and as I tried to go back to sleep, I felt this strange sensation. I have become quite attune to my body and know the muscle spasms and all those feelings but this was different. Really different. I didn’t take it too seriously and thought it was too soon, though books tell to expect movement from week 16 on. That same day at work, there it was again during 6th period as I worked at my desk! It was my conference period, no kids, so I ran to my friend Beth's computer class and asked, “how do you know it’s movement?” Our other classroom teacher was there too and of course I excitingly asked her too! On my way home I called other mama’s and I got to speak to Karla. She is so great, by the way. And there it was, Little Bean was moving! I went to take dinner to Ryan later that night and I felt another poke as I told him about the movements. I think it's difficult for him to wrap his head around this concept.

BUT tonight…but tonight. At about 7:15pm, I was watching Project Runway (sorry Michelle but didn't this season suck?). Anyhow, I had my Buddha Box on my bell and there it was. This people was magical. This was, “I am moving mom, I am rolling over in here.” It was Bean really moving. I cried. I called Ryan. I cried. I know I had felt a little something before but this was full on, “I am swimming in your belly” Just getting choked up reliving this…

1 comment:

Nittle said...

This guy's reading the blog, and enjoying every word. Thanks for dissolving the mystique that surrounds pregnancy with your candor and wit. Peace to you and the fam!